Geylang Si Paku Geylang...

My blood test results came alright. No arthritis! The ointment that the Dr gave previously helped to reduce the swelling as well as the knee pain, but the ankle pain didn't subside...so the Dr I saw today prescribed Mobic tablet for me (he says it's more effective than ointment!). As usual, I forgot to take the medication after buka just now...so just took it now, since I remembered. And I just realised now, after reading up on Mobic...that I just took 1 panadol extra less than 1/2 hr ago!! And I also didn't tell them abt my gastric & bowel troubles. Shit. I hope nothing happens to me.

Ok...on a lighter note...I had applied for whole day leave today so no work! After my Poly appt. I went to Century Square to do some errands. 1 of it was to Nokia Service Centre to enquire abt the repair of my internally-injured phone which Amsyar dropped yesterday morning. Nak marah pun tak kuasa...nasi dah jadi bubur! At the most, he's banned from touching my hp already. Anyways, Nokia is able to repair for me FOC...except, the slider is out of stock, they'll confirm when the stock is coming and then I shall send for repair on Fri (coz I need the phone for work and they need to take my phone for 3 days).

After completing my errands, I headed back home. Got appt. to bring Mom to Geylang...she bought baju kurung & capal for Bro on Sat when she went with Sis, but the baju was a lil tight while the capal was a lil oversized...so she wanted to get them changed. I promised to bring her on Mon (today) since I'm on leave. So once I was home, she got ready & we left. Once I parked at Pasar Geylang, si "pakcik" ni sibuk nak tgk lif (the capsule lift @ S'pore Post visible from the carpark). So I told Mom I'll spend some quality time sightseeing with Amsyar while she do her shopping peacefully (both Amsyar & I prefer sightseeing than shopping!). For close to 1/2hr, it was just Amsyar & I standing & squatting like beggars at the walkway in front of the fence under the MRT track facing S'pore Post (hmmm...I seem to excel in babysitting him!). I bet my Mom enjoyed her shopping spree (since I wasn't there to control her spending! She came back to the car with loads of plastic, but I didn't get a chance to inspect!)

Today was possibly my best ever trip to Geylang. I always questioned Mom abt her frequent trips to Geylang with Sis "aper yg ada kat Geylang tu, tak jelak2 ke gi Geylang?!" Now I know! You want to know? Watch this clip:

If only this was for REAL...

Seems syiok when you watch people play on TV & you start remarking "so easy, itu pun tak tau!" etc etc. Only when I played it, albeit online, that I realise how luck really counts in this game. I may be so close to solving a puzzle, making $$$$ filling up all the consonents & wasting $$$$ buying all the vowels...and there the hook of the wheel decided to "visit" LOSE A TURN la...BANKRUPT la...

Veronica (extreme right, not in picture. oh, btw, I deliberately selected a guy to play next to me!) won the 1st round - that's only because I didn't freaking know how to play this freaking game (hey Nikky, how's my attempt to sound like you?! Hehe). I won the 2nd round. Aherm. I won the 3rd round (dah get the hang of it la tu!). Veronica won the 4th round. Timmy, the guy next to me won't none. Just when I thought I was winning some car or vacation in the last round, my 30 mins trial version expired. Damn! If only this was for REAL!!

PS: If Nashira is reading this -> See what u've done to your Di! Instead of sleeping, she's playing Wheel of Fortune online @ 1.30am!!

Cobaan Ramadhan

It's been a tough Ramadhan at office.

I came to work 1 fine morning and found 3 hot hunks in the office.

They've been standing there at my colleague's (Joanne) cubicle since 8 Sep, like Aladdin's genie. Joanne is seated next to a row of muslims...and I swear these 3 hunks are really diminishing the muslim's pahala puasa day by day!!

The 1st day they arrived, as one would expect, I was the 1st to remark when I passed by and caught sight of them: "Hai...kalau la we really have such hot male colleagues in this office...kan semangat sikit nak dtg kerja!" Only to have the kakak-kakak hushing me "Hish! Awak tu posa!"

I just replied with a grin (for obvious reasons...coz I was on a 1-week break from fasting!).

How does my ugliness or my uglier soul affect a stranger, tell me?!

I controlled & controlled...till I finally accepted that it's beyond my tolerance level (when I cried under the shower)! I just have to let it out.

On Sat, a stranger on Multiply invited me to be his contact. Now those who know my life story would know why my Multiply and all my other sites are privatised. To prevent unauthorised access/viewing by an asshole and anyone remotely connected to the asshole. To protect my family's privacy, if not my own.

So by nature, if I privatise my sites, I decide who gets access right? So this stranger, a teacher, by the name of Elmi Zulkarnain, who has 100+ contacts in his friends list messaged me "Hi...care to add me in your contact list? Ikhlas..."

Now, you think I'll just add? No way! It's my prerogative to filter. I checked his site, 1 of the people in the list was my Sis' best friend (her college mate). So I was quite cautious. I asked Sis if he could be remotely connected to the person I'm trying to prevent access and she assured me confidently that he isn't. She told me that she saw his site in her best friend's site, so checked his profile out (same profession mah!) so perhaps that's how he got linked to my site.

Anyways, I thought it would be rude to not reply, at least I should let him know my concerns. So on Sun, I replied:

"Salaam! Tks for the msg...I'm generally quite cautious abt adding people & all...don't think we know each other? Do you really know all the 100+ ppl in your contact list or you add any and every one?

Any particular reason why you would like to be added in my contact list?"

What kind of reply would I be expecting from the above? Some ikhlas answers like "no we don't know each other, I just happen to stumble upon your site and curious to see the photos..." or "oh, just wanted to widen my circle of friends"...you know something to that effect. Afterall, he gave me this impression of a cultured gentleman. He's into puisi (poetry) and seems to be quite popular in the media. And if by any remote chance, if I feel that yes, this guy is sincere and there's no hidden agenda to let a 3rd party view my site, then I shall accept his invitation (although I'll still control his accessibility to my albums).

No reply on Mon and yesterday as of the time I checked last night. I thought he'd know I wasn't interested to expand my contacts frivolously and would just let it be. Tonight, I saw 2 replies from him:

1st:

"Salam ..
Thanks."

2nd:

"Oh ya, btw I made a mistake. I don't befriends pretenders and wannabes. Especially ugly ones with uglier souls.."

I swear when I saw the above, my immediate reaction was to reply: "Good for you!"...but being Ramadhan (I've to uphold certain promises to Allah), I controlled myself, decided it's best to leave him to Allah & closed the window w/o sending the reply! (If only I can be like that 365 days and not just Ramadhan right? Trying...trying...). I thought, why shld I even waste my time & sin over a stranger who holds no weight in my life? The good thing out of the above was that I was damn happy to discover what a "cultured refined gentleman" he was...that persona just didn't fit the picture of him I had in my mind when I checked out his site. If he thought being popular & creatively successful puts him up there on the pedestal, he may be deceiving himself.

Why I cried? You see, I know I'm ugly and I know how ugly my soul is. Something which I've always reiterated to people. However, I don't think anyone (esp a STRANGER) has a right to judge me! Especially when he doesn't even know me. I can't believe a harmless question would hurt his ego so badly that his true self would surface!! I feel like telling him to mirror himself. Neither is he good-looking himself (I can post his picture here, but won't stoop to that level...just the name will suffice, hopefully if by any remote chance anyone knows him can counsel him) nor his soul...ah wth, his reply speaks about his soul, who am I to comment?

I always ask all my new friends whom I know online...what is it about me that made them so drawn to me, despite knowing what a mean and bitchy person I am. I welcome anyone to leave me...anytime. One will be surprised to know that Kamaliah was the first person I got to know online and we're like long-time buddies till today. And then it was Shazadi. My family knows her now and we've even lived together for 3 days. And these people initiated the friendship with a message on Friendster, which I have the liberty to not reply since I don't reply to female's messages esp those who offer a hand in friendship. My 1st reaction would be "oookkaaayy...I'm straight!" But something compelled me to respond. Tehzeeb (who'd add anybody and everybody to her contact list) was also an online buddy for many years before we started chatting more and I discovered she's my Dad's cousin's daughter! I mean, these very people today hold a special place in my life and heart. You people, don't you ever regret & wish I'm not in your life?!?!

I wish I know what these people saw in me to value me so much bcoz not a single day have I lived loving myself. I detest myself and my very existence.

I don't know what I intended to express in this entry...but I guess I just had to let it out bcoz I still can't fathom how my Madhuri-wannabe attitude, my ugliness and my uglier-than-my-face soul affects a stranger?

Arjun Rampal told me in Ek Ajnabee: "Mama told me...don't be talking to the stranger...don't be talking to the stranger...stranger is danger!"

Tipu Singh

No one is luckier than Amsyar to have me as an aunt! Really. :-P

Last night I was chatting with Nikky while eating mini Smarties in bed. When I finished, I thought the box was q. cute...and so an idea struck me! Since Amsyar is like semut/tikus(appears wherever there's food!)...and he likes to make his way into my room & mess up my side table, I decided to leave the 2 empty boxes of mini Smarties there as a trap to lure the rat (who's more of a bRAT actually!)...his reaction would definitely be worth capturing!

I went to sleep after telling Nikky abt my plan. What I didn't know, however, was that my wish would be fulfilled immediately after I woke up for Sahur. He was already awake, so he joined us at the kitchen table. After I finished eating and headed inside...he ran after me from behind after grabbing his toy bus & crocodile bendable pen...overtook me...reached my door 1st & started knocking "Assamaykom!". I replied "Wa'alaikumsalam!" & opened the door. He dashed in (tau pun takut, pleaded me "Maasi bukak lampu")...I switched on the lights for him...he happily looked at my side table, saw something (that thing!)...dashed for it...and...

The Crybaby

You'll be surprised to learn:
1. How vain he is - he instantly stops crying when he realised he's being filmed!
2. What a crybaby he is - which also shows how stubborn he can be when he can't get what he wants!



This is the 1st time I decided to film him at his worst behaviour threatening to shame him "publicly" hoping he'd stop his nonsense...but he didn't!! Actually what happened was that since the car was brought down earlier in the afternoon, I kept the car in the balcony so that he doesn't drive it around the house as the wheels would have been dirtied (since it's almost his bedtime, I wasn't abt to wipe the wheels for him to play either). Usually, when the car is in the living room, he doesn't drive it. When it's in the balcony (charging), he insists he wants to drive the car & adamantly begs that we bring it out to the living room for him. Look at how he tries to lift it up himself & knowing he can't, he cries! I love to disturb him when he's in that mood...don't know what he was mumbling at the end of the video! So cute the face! I had a blast laughing at him in the presence of his mom laughing in the background!

Raising Amsyar...

I'd do anything in the world to see him beaming with happiness like this every second of his life!

1st Ramadhan

I had a wonderful start to Ramadhan this year. To begin with, I'm on MC today. Couple of months ago, my ankle started swelling/paining. It's been straining (since I walk a lot at work) that I told myself I should consult the Dr. I procrastinated becoz (don't laugh ok!)...I think my legs should be waxed 1st! Yes I'm vain, but what if I ended up being checked by the Dr I've a crush on?!

When I finally waxed, I still didn't go becoz I was too busy at work day in day out. 2 wks after that, my knee started swelling pulak! Very nice. Just on the 1st day of trawih!! I can't bend my knees, I can't squat, I've problems standing up after sitting down...and walking is a chore. So I woke up on Mon 1 Sep telling myself "to hell with work!". I decided to get myself checked, so I made a trip to Tampines Polyclinic.

And here, my 1st Ramadhan tests took place 1 after another:

1. In bus, just 2-3 stops before Tampines Polyclinic, 1 chinese boy started playing music on his hp (chinese song!). Alamak...aku mmg pantang pe'el buruk cam ni. Hello! Not everybody enjoy your stupid chinese music ok!? How wld anyone like to hear some cool hindi music?! It was very tough anger-management for me coz I was seated just next to the hammer meant for breaking window in case of emergency! That guy must be tired of living! There was 2 Indian lady (possibly mother & daughter) 2 seat in front of me. She kept looking back at that boy, obviously not a supporter of such uncivilised behaviour in public! I was so close to asking her "excuse me, wld u like to have some hindi music?" but it was 1st Ramadhan...so...CONTROL! Thank God I reached my bus stop before I reached for the hammer!

2. Took my Q. no. Got seated at Registration. Quite a long q. of patients, but the q. moved very fast. Tried to catch some sleep while waiting (ngantuk ah, barely had 5 hrs of sleep plus deprived of sleep the last few days due to Amsyar's birthday). Just when I was abt to enter la-la land, some lame malay kental song started playing in the background. I turned to my right across the other seats...a young Sec (God knows maybe Pri!) Sch girl was seated, hugging her equally young (but not wearing uniform) bf and the guy was playing song on his hp for their listening pleasure. I swear if it was some Rabbani, Raihan or Hijjaz nasyids, I wldn't have minded. Unfortunately, or fortunately, there was no hammer at Polyclinic! The other issue that irritated me is this teenage dating. With all due respect to those who started dating in school & went to important places like clinics etc with your bf/gf instead of parents/family member, everytime I see such things, this is what goes through in my heart/mind: "Kesian eh...kecik2 mak bapak dah mampos! Nasib baik ada matair utk bawak gi Dr, kalau tak mesti mampos!". Independent la sikit. Hey, I'm not jealoused ok, not that I wasn't blessed with such pleasures, as a matter of fact, my refusal to have my bf accompanying me for my errands & vice versa are cause of fights in my relationships! Everyone's entitled to their own opinion...I know. Just that I feel going Dr/hospital, job interviews, registration for schools etc, all these we should be going with our parent/family member. Kalau parents suruh temankan gi Dr, susah, kalau bf/gf, tak payah suruh pun sanggup! Besok dah kahwin, spouse suruh teman, liat! That's what I observe, sebab tu I anti all these behaviour. Family is more important. Usually I keep quiet, maybe coz it's 1st Ramadhan, so I can't take all these nonsense.

3. Waited in front of Room No. 23. Dr Rekha Rajan. Hey, I remember this room & this name. Amsyar used to see her during his early infant days (jaundice) for abt 1 mth. No, the Dr didn't irritate me. While waiting for my No. (5th in the Q)...there was this baby in front of me. Same thing la, infant vaccination (ala kesian nya). I think the baby just had her injection, so a bit restless & in pain. She was being carried by the maid. Next to the maid, the mother. I know the mother coz the baby's feature just like her. Except the baby has naturally brown feature (hair & bulu roma, eyebrow all)...she has dyed-brown hair...but typical chinese feature. Maybe married ang-mo? Dunno & don't care. Not the topic here. Finally...this is what irritated me. The maid was carrying the baby and the bag was in front. She struggled to take out the pacifier for the baby. The ma'am just sit & cross her leg watching. Then their no. flashed. The ma'am walked in front...holding the child medical book with the necessary clinic forms. The maid struggles to carry the child comfortably and took the bag. The ma'am open the clinic door, went slightly inside to "konon" hold the door for the maid (actually probably for the baby la!)...but not giving the maid enough space to enter comfortably w/o having to manouver herself to avoid the baby or the big bag hiting the wall/door. Thank God nothing happened. Shortly after they went out. Still the ma'am came out lenggang lenggok. I find it puzzling how you can bear the pain of pregnancy & childbirth, but have no passion to handle your cute baby!! Pemalas nak mampos! Make babies champion! Jaga malas! She was so detached from her baby. On the other hand, the baby is so comfortable in the hands of the maid. She so sayang the baby like her own baby. Aiyoh...I see my Sis & Mom fight to handle the baby, I yg pening kepala, in the end I step in "sudah2, let me carry, dua2 jgn carry!" In all honesty, I had thought my Sis wld turn out to be like that ma'am becoz she pemalas nak mampos...but I was wrong! So when she didn't turn out to be like that...it pissed me off to see what I saw today.

I finally saw Dr Rekha Rajan who ordered a blood test to rule out Rheumatoid Arthritis 1st before refering me to a specialist if the swelling/pain doesn't subside. Results will be known on 15 Sep. She gave me some ointment, hopefully it'd help.

Ya...so that was the 3 things that irritated the shit out of me on my 1st Ramadhan this year!

Other than these 3 the other thing that constantly bugs me is this group of bikers who starts vrooming and making a din from 2am every night at the adjacent's block "senior citizen's corner"!! I hate it becoz I'll be startled out of my slumber by the bike & laughter noise which is not healthy! After that, I'll have problems trying to get back to sleep. Sekali dua, I can call the NPC to ask them to patrol (insted of playing games or talking cock in the Centre!) & control the noise. Takkan I must on my hp every single morning just for this, right? I can just hope 1 day the authorities will use their brain and police all these. Afterall, they're the smart alec who created the "senior citizen corner" which is not used by the senior citizen...but the junior citizen for romancing and for the mat motors and their minahs to memekak! Ya ya I know...ROCK NEBER DIES!